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#!/bin/sh
cat <<EOF
USER PID %CPU %MEM VSZ RSS TTY STAT START TIME COMMAND
root 2 0.0 0.0 0 0 ? S Aug28 0:00 [kthreadd]
root 3 0.0 0.0 0 0 ? S Aug28 0:43 \_ [ksoftirqd/0]
...
root 1 0.0 0.0 2976 624 ? Ss Aug28 0:07 init [2]
root 495 0.0 0.0 3888 1640 ? Ss Aug28 0:00 udevd --daemon
...
[MORE FAKE ps OUTPUT]
EOF
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